Ninia lives in Hanover, is a presenter, author, speaker and actress and mother of one child. In this interview, Ninia talks about her pregnancy and birth, the challenges she faced as a person of short stature and why disabled people who are pregnant do not need special treatment, but simply good, close-knit and empathetic care and support like everyone else. Content warning: In the interview, Ninia also talks about stressful birth experiences and the time her child was in the children's intensive care unit. Photo credit: Anna Peschke
Hello Ninia! First things first: Thank you for taking the time today to tell us about your experience of pregnancy, birth and the postpartum period as a person with a disability. But before we get started, please introduce yourself briefly to our readers.
Hi, I'm Ninia, I live in beautiful Hanover and I'm a freelance presenter, author, speaker and actress. I present on event stages, in front of cameras and in the podcast studio. My focus is on society, politics, sport and fashion. I like reading cheesy romcoms and could live on chips seven days a week. Luckily, my husband cooks for me and our child at home.
Thank you :). Today we want to talk about ableism. Ableism means that people in everyday life are reduced to their physical or mental disability or, for example, a learning difficulty and are treated unequally. And because we are here at the weeks, it is of course about pregnancy - and in this context, ableism is a huge topic. Maybe we should start from the beginning, with the desire to have children - in many cases, this is practically denied to people with disabilities. Have you also been confronted with irritation when you said that you might want to have children - or has it even influenced your thoughts about having children?
For a long time, I was the only person of short stature in my family and in my personal environment. Until I met other people of short stature and disabilities on the Internet who had had similar experiences to me - and who could of course also be role models for parenthood. My desire to have children was not always strong and was not influenced by this. I always thought that if I wanted to have a child one day, I would manage it. The topic was not brought up to me beforehand from outside either - but when I was pregnant, the question came up quite often whether it had been intentional. I can hardly imagine that non-disabled people are asked that too. I had more check-ups than usual and went to the human geneticist, also to try to find out whether my child would also be short. It would have made no difference to me, I simply bowed to the pressure from the medical side because I was sure that there would have been no consequences for me and us as a couple if the child had also been short.
Medical care related to pregnancy, birth and the postpartum period is often not sensitive to discrimination due to a lack of staff, a lack of sensitivity and insufficient training in discrimination among caregivers. What experiences have you had with discrimination/ableism in a medical context? What challenges have you encountered and how did you deal with them?
I once had a situation with a doctor who said to me during an ultrasound with a smile, "Well, we can be sure that it won't be like you." I found that completely inappropriate. My own gynecologist is very cool, which is why she's my gynecologist, and she just said, "What goes in, comes out." Otherwise, I had similar experiences to many other people who become parents, although they didn't necessarily have anything to do with my height. During my pregnancy, I asked myself how I would cope when the child got bigger and I could no longer carry it because of my height. Another short mother said to me, "Then you can both sit on the floor." It can be that simple.
And let's look at the birth: to what extent do you feel that you were free to decide how you would give birth to your child? Or were you "pressured" into a certain form of birth?
I was examined beforehand to see whether my pelvis was ready for a vaginal birth, even with my size. That would have been possible. But in the end, labor was induced on the due date, with a medication that is no longer allowed in Germany. It was only later that I realized that I was being pressured into it. With the first birth, you are always uncertain, you rely on professionals, and I didn't want the baby to grow any bigger inside me. However, my baby then wrapped the umbilical cord around its neck twice and, when its heartbeat stopped, it had to be delivered in a very quick emergency caesarean section and resuscitated. It was then in a cold bed for three days, where the body is cooled down so that the brain can recover from the lack of oxygen, and then in intensive care for almost two weeks to be nursed back to health. This was all a very unusual case, even in the university hospital where I gave birth, and probably had more to do with the induction and the medication than with my body size. So, no, I had almost the opposite feeling of being able to decide freely :D.
The postpartum period is about, among other things, settling into the new role as a parent, healing, and getting to know the baby. Do you feel that you faced any particular challenges during this time because of your disability? And was there any special help you could get?
Given the circumstances of the birth, I did not have a traditional postpartum period, regardless of my disability. I was in the clinic every day to give my pumped milk and visit my child. There was not much time to settle into the new role and heal. That only happened when we were allowed to take the child home two weeks later. I had no special help other than that of my midwife.
People with disabilities are hardly visible in society anyway - and pregnant people with disabilities or small children even less so. What was it like for you? Were you approached by strangers as a visibly pregnant and disabled person or after the birth with your baby/child? How did you deal with it?
Yes, I actually was. From the assumption that I was still a young teenager or the questions about how the birth was or whether "at least" the father was tall. I always answer these quite directly and often sarcastically.
In your opinion, what needs to happen in the context of pregnancy, birth and the postpartum period in order to effectively combat discrimination based on disabilities?
Basically everything that needs to be improved: working conditions, the level of care, etc. I would like it if midwives and medical staff learned more about disabilities and ableism in their training - and that a disability is not an absolute exception or something terrible. In my antenatal course, birth complications and pregnancies like mine were practically not part of the plan. Disabled people who are pregnant do not need special treatment, but simply good, close-knit and empathetic care and support like everyone else.
And, if you want, what advice would you give to other people with disabilities who are thinking about starting a family or coping with pregnancy?
Go for it.
Yeah! Thank you for the wonderful conversation!
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We at the weeks want to focus even more on the topic of "ableism" in the context of pregnancy, birth and the postpartum period and are in the process of preparing more interviews with great people, but we still need a moment for that. In the meantime, you can read on here:
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Fat and Pregnant – an interview with yoga teacher Sophie from Sophie's Safe Space
